On August 22, 2016, a blue little baby boy was born. Doctors rushed him to the baby bed and worked hard to give him oxygen. Once he pinked up, they took him away to the NICU and I didn’t get to see his face. His name is Judah.  

Judah was born without kidneys. He had been diagnosed at 21 weeks gestation and our doctor had told us there was nothing we could do. Without his kidneys, he wouldn’t urinate and, consequently, he wouldn’t have any amniotic fluid. This would lead to his lungs failing to develop and his growth being incredibly restricted. We were devastated and went home, unsure of what to do but not yet willing to give up. 

I started telling friends and family. One of my friends then sent me an article about the first baby to survive without kidneys. This had been done through a process called amnioinfusion, where the doctor injects normal saline (salt water, basically) into the mother’s womb to replace the missing amniotic fluid and to try and give the baby a change to grow and develop their lungs. We started calling hospitals. Two were doing trials. Only one had a spot for us.  

A day before our 4th wedding anniversary, we left home on a one-way ticket to Cincinnati. We had no idea when we would be coming back. After 2 days of tests, they told us Judah absolutely didn’t have any kidneys and that his lungs were too small. But if we were willing to try, they were willing to help.  

A week later I had surgery to have an amnioport placed. We had infusions 3 days a week. I went into premature labor but they stopped it. I was on strict bed rest for the next 9 weeks. And then the day came when my water broke and they only able to delay his birth by a few more days – enough time to give me steroid shots to hopefully help his little lungs.  

He was born silently and blue via c-section. I didn’t get to see him. My husband went with him to the NICU as they put me under because I was still feeling some pain. I got to see his feet in the transfer incubator before he went to the children’s hospital. I didn’t see his face until the next day. But there he was, maxed out on blood pressure medications, intubated but alive. And I couldn’t believe that he was mine.  

Judah lived for 6 months 2 days and 22 hours. It was much longer than the mere hours we were told we might get with him. At 4 months old, we transferred him to a hospital closer to home. At 6 months, 1 day, I watched him go blue and limp in my arms. They were able to keep him alive, but he never came back. After a day and a half of holding him and not letting go, Judah passed away on my chest and we walked out of the hospital with nothing but a box of memories. February 25, 2017 is a day that is forever seared into my memory.  

As we got closer to Judah’s first birthday, I wanted to do something in his honor. I decided to put together some care packages for the babies and their families in the NICU at Texas Children’s Hospital, where he had passed away. Through the generosity of family, friends, and strangers, we were able to provide 58 care packages, almost enough to cover every single bed in the NICU. Last year, we did it again, this time providing 43 care packages.  We have decided to make this a yearly tradition. 

Being a parent in the NICU is incredibly difficult. You don’t think about yourself – often you don’t eat and you sleep upright in a chair in the corner. If you’re lucky, the Ronald McDonald House annex will have a bed for you to sleep in so you can be just down the hall from your baby, should anything go wrong overnight. We use these care packages to try and ease the burden of being away from home, of not being able to hold your baby, of sitting and waiting and wondering if they will live or die. And we use them to share Judah’s story of hope and perseverance.  

It hardly feels real, but Judah’s 3rd birthday is fast approaching. So I’m starting the call for donations to fill these packages and give these families hope. A baby registry has been created on Babylist with the needed items. Our address is already pre-filled so you can send the items straight to us.  

I also wanted to ask this year for makers to contribute with handmade items. This can be almost anything – hats, socks, or clothes for the babies, decorations to brighten up their space, crochet octopuses or other toys, items for mom and dad, ect.  There are just a few rules if you’re going to make items that the babies will touch. 

Make sure your hands are clean while you work on them and that you aren’t sick. And make them out of the softest materials you can find. Bamboo and cotton are a couple of my favorites. Preemies are born before they finish developing and, as such, their skin is incredibly sensitive. It can cause a micropreemie pain to be stroked because their skin is so fragile and their nerves so immature. So please take great care when making any items for a sick baby.  

I am so incredibly grateful for all the love and support we have received with making these packages so far. I hope you will join us in helping make another parent’s day a little better when they receive one of these packages. Thank you in advance. It means so much to us.   

Link to Babylist: www.babylist.com/miri-morgan

How to send handmade items:

Message me either on my website, Etsy, Instagram (instagram.com/elephantbearandfox), or Facebook (facebook.com/elephantbearandfox) for my address once you have completed your items.